I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
