his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize