Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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