wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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