Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
