hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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