he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
