i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
