i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
