I think my vagina is haunted
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
