I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
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