Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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