It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
