Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
they're like a gay fantastic four
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
