Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize