Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize