they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
