If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize