Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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