look no pants
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
