I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
