Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
