Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
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