I wish I could punch you in the face.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
