You can't motorboat a personality
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
