in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
FUCK WHALES
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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