I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize