Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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