Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i was born a porn star she said
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
