can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
so let's talk penis.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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