big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
