I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
