I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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