I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
