You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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