the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
