I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
