Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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