Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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