he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
