it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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