I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
