i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
