I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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