also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize