apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
