There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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