he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
