When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
