I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He called his prostate his "boner button".
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
i think my cat just said my name.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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